Thursday, June 9, 2011

I Feel Like I'm Being Melodramatic

I took my last final today. The Professor Emailed us a "very generous" review that was just a copy of the final exam, so it was ridiculously easy. He tried to tell us the exam was a verbatim copy of the review, but it was. The questions weren't rearranged nor were the answers. I took 20 minutes to do 100 questions and then I was out of there.

I feel bad for complaining about the review just being the final exam. It did certainly make my life easier. However, it's almost insulting to me as a student. One thing is that it's super lazy. Also, I feel almost like my intelligence was insulted. I know how to study without having the exam in front of me. Also, I think the people who saw me studying thought I was big cheater. It is kind of conspicuous studying from a paper labeled "Final Exam" with all the questions on it.

I really had a rough time this quarter. The classes weren't even that challenging; last quarter was much worse in that department. I just lacked motivation, focus and willingness to do a lot of the things I normally do to do well. I just didn't do important stuff. My mind kept slipping throughout the quarter and it's basically gone at the moment.

As I said, it wasn't that the classes were really hard. I even dropped one, so the load was minimal. The problem was that my living situation became super stressful to me. It's just a big mind-fuck and it took its toll in the classroom. I don't really want to go into detail about the situation I speak of, because I don't even feel that comfortable talking about it with those I trust with information. Suffice to say it's bad and I don't have the means to change it right now.

Another thing that happened during this quarter was that all the Semester schools had their graduations. This shouldn't have affected me, but it did. A lot of the people I went to high school with graduated and it just ended up making me feel bad. I feel like I'm so far behind where I should be. I'm also afraid that I'll never be able to catch up.

I'm just really glad that I'm not going Summer Quarter. I may take an online class if I have the money for it to make up for the class I dropped. I don't know exactly when I'll be back to being a full-time student. It may take a while to get my financial house in order to make the big move to Ohio State. It's tough right now especially, because I can't help, but feeling that getting out of my living-situations is more important than continuing to go to school. I also now that's self-destructive and not at all prudent.

I'm really looking forward to this weekend though. As I've stated many times before, I don't really have a life, but when I do it comes in spurts. I'm going to two concerts this weekend. I'm going to see Okkervil River on Saturday night. I've been excited about that one for a while. On Sunday*, I'm going to a Wizard Rock Show in Akron with my Mom. It's Lauren Fairweather, The Whomping Willows and Justin Finch-Fletchley.

I'll be missing two important soccer matches for these things, so my twitter followers will be getting a reprieve.

Question of the Day: What are your thoughts on going to a concert by yourself? I've done it twice and both times made temporary friends, which is impressive considering how socially inept I am. Is it better or worse than going to the movies by yourself**?

Thanks for reading and please comment.

*This plan isn't exactly set in stone yet.
**Something I've never done

1 comment:

  1. One. I agree with you about tests like that. No one is really learning anything if all you have to do is memorize a few answers for an exam.
    Two. I hope everything works out for you with school and everything.
    Three. I'm going to see the Lauren Fairweather, The Whomping Willows, and Justin Finch-Fletchley show on Saturday with my mom in Pittsburgh :)