Monday, April 30, 2012


This weekend I went on a trip to Huntington, West Virginia to visit my best friend Pat. 

Friday started off a bit oddly for me. Mom had already left for her trip and I needed to get out of my house without becoming part of a melodramatic scene involving my Father. That went surprisingly well. I managed to get out with everything I needed for the weekend stuffed in my backpack without having to interact with him at all*.

I got to work and found that only one other car was in the parking lot and the door was locked. I was let in and learned that only Carla and I were going to work that day. It was already scheduled to be a work day since neither Doctor would be there, but everyone else called off, so we kept the doors locked. We worked until 1:00

I needed to run a few errands before taking off for Huntington. I had to run by the bank. I went to Kroger to pick up some Woodchuck and deodorant**. I went to Chipotle, because I was serving as Chiptole burrito delivery person for Pat's girlfriend. Of course, I also picked one up for my own lunch. Then I filled up my gas tank and got on the road for my trip to Huntington.

I got down there at about 5:00 after a pretty uneventful drive. We hung out for a bit and then went out to dinner at Five Guys. After a trip to Gamestop, we went back to Pat's place. His housemates went to their room and Pat and I sat around the living room watching the draft.

I had a few drinks, and in what was a bit of a surprise*** to me, Pat, Tommy and I went down to Marshall's radio station. So, before I knew it, a not-so-sober-Michael was talking about sports on the radio from about 10 until midnight. That was definitely a first for me. It was fun, but our most heated discussions happened off the air. I tied one more on after getting back to their place.

The next day, Pat, Tommy, Andy and I got up and went paintballing. The place was the backwoods of West Virginia/real Deliverance country. I'd never been before, so it was another new experience for me. After signing a waiver and getting our guns and gear, we started playing. It was fun, but I'm not very good at shooting accurately or hiding or being aware of my surroundings. My first game I took a paintball right to the mask.

I took my share of paintballs on Saturday. Most didn't hurt. However, I took one directly to tip of my left forefinger. I had even rented the gloves, but the tips of the fingers were cut out, so it didn't help. The game we were playing at the was one that wasn't elimination based, so despite my bleeding I toughed it out for the rest of the time. I washed it off after the game and came to realize how badly it hurt after a few minutes.

We played several more games and left just in time to miss the rain. We headed back towards Huntington. We ate at Steak 'n Shake. While we were there, two big church groups showed up. We started playing M/F/K and that devolved into... well... a discussion about what it would take to get any of us fellate another man. We definitely keep it classy.

When we got back to Pat's place, we hung around for a bit. I started drinking at about 7:30 and did a very bad job at pacing myself. Five Woodchucks and three hours later I was throwing up. I'd never done that before either. Vomiting isn't pleasant. I'm definitely going to avoid alcohol for a bit. The one thing I will say, is that I felt much better after throwing up. I was still too drunk to effectively function at a level higher than, let's say, a toddler, but I felt better.

We were going to go out, but kindly enough Pat made the call to stay in on my behalf. We ended up playing Uno on the floor. I don't really remember if we did anything else after that. I just remember everyone going to bed and I quickly fell asleep on the couch.

I woke up on Sunday at about 9:30 and felt surprisingly good. My head didn't hurt. I wasn't sore besides my finger and neck. My stomach was upset with me, but besides that I was doing alright. Pat and I hung out for a bit that morning and then said our goodbyes.

I went to visit my Sister on my way back. She helped me get some dressing on my wounded finger. She had my Birthday Card for me and had made delicious brownies. Sarah and I just sat around for a few hours with her gigantic dogs before I headed back to Columbus to start working on homework.

Since, I went two different ways I made a few observations. The towns across from Kentucky on the Ohio River all have very simple/literal names. There's Hanging Rock, Southpoint and Ironton. Across from West Virginia the towns have more complicated names. There's Athalia, Eureka, and Gallipolis.

Also, I think I'm going to start making that trip through Athens everytime. While going down U.S. 23 and 52 is shorter in terms of distance, it's pretty equal in terms of time. Also, U.S. 23 has some many towns that you have to go through. There's only one on U.S. 33 and the traffic is better on State Route 7 than on U.S. 52. Most importantly, going through Athens is a much smother drive. U.S. 23 is much bumpier than U.S. 33 and that is very important when riding on a truck's suspension.

And that's your traffic report.

Tomorrow is my birthday. No exciting plans. I definitely enjoyed my birthday weekend though.

Thanks for reading


*In perhaps my most passive-aggressive/Ken Thomas-type move to date left a note saying I'd be back on Sunday.
**I always forget to pack deodorant
***I'm pretty sure I was told that we were doing this several times, but I didn't remember.

P.S. Get Well Soon, Emma!

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Well Rested Artist

I have gotten enough sleep two nights in a row. This is amazing. I'm not really sure what exactly has changed. In fact, I'm a bit surprised. Let me tell you my short story of Thursday and Friday.

I'd had a terrible time sleeping on Wednesday night as had become my habit. I went to work and sluggishly did my job. Afterwards, I got my lunch at Wendy's* and came home. When, I got home I had an email from the guy who had initially shown interest in my electric guitar about coming to see it. We exchanged a couple emails and set up a meeting for Friday.

Dad then started asking me to do shit. First he wanted me to clear out the bed of my truck and go pick up some soil. That's no big deal. I'm always annoyed when he asks me to do absolutely anything, but that I can get over. I went to get some soil and wasn't asked to help move it into place, which was nice, because actually working on something with my Father is basically torture.

Later that day, he came and asked me to go with him to pick up a car from a mechanic. Being in close proximity to him is very stressful for me. There's been a particularly anxious cloud over my head in regards to him recently and the way he was bitching didn't help**. So, once he got out and got the car, I had a panic attack.

I got home at about 7:00 and took half a Xanax, which helped a little bit, but wasn't quite effective as it had been in the past. I took the other half at about 11:15, which is a little bit earlier than recommended on the bottle***. That hit me and I was out by 11:30.

I remember setting my alarm on Thursday night. It didn't wake me up though. I don't know if it just didn't work, or if I just woke up and turned it off in a sleepy state. However, I actually woke up and it was 8:50. That was an oh-shit moment since I was supposed to be at work at 9:00.

My typical morning when I have to work is this****: My alarm goes out at 8:00. I get up, turn on my computer and take a piss. Once my computer is booted up, I check in order: my emails, Twitter, Tumblr, Blogger, YouTube, Google Reader, [site redacted], and Facebook. Those things usually take up my the right amount time before I have to get ready. After dressing, I'm usually out the door at about a quarter til 9:00

 Back to the story. So, I jumped up and hurriedly got ready for work. I got into work at about 9:15. My function at work isn't particularly time dependent, so being late isn't such a big deal, but I still felt bad about it. However, I felt worse in general. I think what the way I was feeling was a hangover. I had a terrible headache and generally felt like shit until about 1:30.

When, I got home from work I got my amp and pedals set up in the garage for this guy to come check out my guitar. Dad wasn't home, which was such a relief. He had agreed to show up at 2:00 and he was a little bit early, which I liked. I grabbed the guitar and let him check it out. As he was doing it Dad showed up. My Stress level jumped. Fortunately, Dad didn't do anything to scare the guy off. I would've been much happier had he just not known that I was selling it though.

The guy agreed to buy it for $235 and he was gone by 2:05. It was a painless deal. I had money for a guitar that I rarely played. Well, almost painless. Dad came to bitch at me about it. Saying he would've bought and let me keep it and claiming that he was proud of "such a nice guitar in his house." He bitched at me for a while, but I basically tuned him out. I would never agree to sell him anything. If he could claim ownership over anything I use, it is just going to be hell later.

The rest of yesterday was pretty awesome though. Emma and I traded pictures. Now, I'm left in a quandary as to what to do with this picture. It certainly can never go in the garbage. Should it be in a museum? I'm not sure, but it needs a place with more dignity than my desk.

Pretty much the rest of my past two days has been spent playing Trials Evolution and not doing the homework I ought to be doing given my weekend plans. Tonight, I'm going to the Crew game and tomorrow I'm going to Sarah's for my victory Pie.

Thanks for reading


*Originally from Columbus, Ohio, Emma xD
**I would like to be more specific, but I really don't want to worry anyone.
***It says "1/2-1 up to four times a day for anxiety; sleep" so it wasn't like I was abusing it.
****Provided I don't wake up before my alarm, which I have basically done everyday for the past few weeks.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Gaming Tuesday- Next Generation of Consoles

It's been a while right? I've been skipping out on doing this post for months, because I haven't had the desire to do it. So, a quick recap since the last time I've done this.

I passed 30,000 gamer score. It's very exciting for me, because that's what I call my "e-penis"*.

I missed playing a lot of the big games that came out near the end of 2011. I've really tightened my purse strings. I played Saint's Row the Third, Modern Warfare 3, and Assassin's Creed: Revelations.

A Super Late 2011 Wrap-up

In terms of 2011 games, I would say my Favorite was Saint's Row. I missed out on Arkham City, which I think I will really enjoy once I get around to it. L.A. Noire was disappointing to me based on the quality of gameplay I expect from Rockstar. There were amazing graphics in that game, but it just don't quite have what I like to see from an open world game. It was just too linear. Also, another thing really hurt was the game being on multiple discs on 360.

Modern Warfare 3 and Assassin's Creed both were great games, but they didn't quite do it for me. Call of Duty's campaign was even more over the top than Black Ops' was. It was nice to have the story wrapped up, but I really didn't have a fucking clue how to follow the story. The multiplayer was interesting and fun, but I just am so CoD fatigued that it just didn't offer enough for me to stick with it.

Assassin's Creed felt like a bit of a let down after how fantastic Brotherhood was. I'm not sure exactly how to quantify my feelings about. The gameplay was fine. The story wasn't as good, but it certainly wasn't a bad either. It just felt like such a rehash. I'm fine with sticking with what works, but I just didn't feel any progression in this game. It kind of just seemed like an annual money grab.

Saint's Row the Third was exactly what I expected it to be. It didn't try to be something it's not. It's fun. It's silly. It's easy. Lots of explosions. Lots of ridiculous weapons. Dick punches. Over the top and unabashed about it. It was just so enjoyable to play and stress free.

Next-Gen Consoles

There have been lots of leaks and rumors about the next generation of consoles; many alarmist stories about DRM and the crusade against used game sales. I don't exactly understand why the video game companies have such an issue with Gamestop really, but they do and it may be enough of a carrot to them to start developing an a new console.

I'm not sure what exactly they're going to look like. I feel like the Playstation 4 leaks are more likely than the Xbox 720 leaks. However, I think both Sony and Microsoft didn't want to release next gen consoles until 2015, but it seems Sony trying to recover from the fiasco with PSN last year and their inability to compete with Microsoft in this round of consoles is causing them to push for something sooner. If there is any credibility to the 720 rumors, which I kind of doubt, it seems like Microsoft is pushing up in response to Sony to keep their edge.

I kind of have the feeling that Sony and Microsoft are on different paths. I think Sony is looking at a future with Blu-ray and Microsoft looking at digital distribution. Putting Blu-ray into a console was the PS3's crowning achievement and I suspect the next Sony console will improve on that with better internal memory.

Microsoft on the other hand seems to be refining the means of having a console that is disc-drive free. The introduction of Games-on-Demand and cloud storage to the 360 makes it a disc drive unnecessary except to play the newest titles. With that said, if Microsoft are indeed pushing up the 720 it would almost have to have a disc-drive, because I don't think the digital distribution is quite robust enough yet to be the only means to gameplay and if a 720 has a disc drive it would have to be Blu-ray. There is no doubt that HD-DVD was the wrong horse to bet on and the 360's lack of readable disc space was made clear by L.A. Noire last year.

I am a big proponent of digital distribution. There are some issues with DRM that will need to be sorted out, but I think would be a great future for video games. The lack of discs or a disc drive are two more pieces of hardware that one wouldn't have to worry about failing. It also is really convenient. I've started using Games-on-Demand recently and love it. Things are kind of over priced right now, but I feel like that would correct itself if there were new releases on there and the means of downloading was more efficient.

If I was braver, I would proclaim, "Physical media is dead." I'm not quite that brave yet, but I definitely think it's on it's death bed.

One thing I definitely believe that has come from the rumors is that an internet connection is probably going to be required to play the next generation consoles. It is unfortunate, but the nature of digital distribution and the prospect of piracy are going to make the manufacturers want an account to tie individuals to and a way to track them easily.

No one cares about Nintendo. Shut up and go play your Wii.

Thanks for reading



Monday, April 16, 2012

Friend Zone

When you're me, most of the time when you like someone you either 1) are pining over someone who you won't ever speak to or 2) end up the "Friend Zone". I am pathologically shy and not attractive, so the likelihood of me starting a relationship with a strange woman is very low especially a romantic one. So, if I am to have a romantic relationship, and the nice things that come with one*, it will almost undoubtedly be with a girl I already know and am friends with.

Having a crush on some girl you don't really know from class isn't that bad. In fact it's kind of fun. Currently, I have one of those on Hipster Girl. Unless she takes an interest in me, nothing is ever going to happen between us and I'm fine with that. I will hand in the final on the last day of class and never see her again. I will have had my crush and moved on

It sucks having a crush on a friend and it not being reciprocated. It is really easy to build up resentment towards that person as well. I know I've been guilty of being upset with friends I've liked for not liking me back or having boyfriends. It is really easy to feel bitter and rejected, but it isn't right.

Your feelings probably aren't as subtle as you think; he or she knows that you like him or her. The person you like isn't being a terrible bitch or asshole or teasing you or trying to play you. You are emotionally valuable to that person as a friend. That is why you are in the "Friend-zone." It's not some malicious reason; it's because you are a friend. He or she is trying to be kind and to save the friendship by not flat out rejecting you, because he or she doesn't want to lose you and having to reject you is the last thing he or she wants to do.

Another thing is that the you trying to get your friend to like you, is almost the worst version of yourself. He is selfish and petty; doing things to get her to like him rather than because he is her friend. No one worth being with is ever going to like you back when you act like that. It likely just would make things weird between the two of you, which absolutely puts an end to your chances.

Friendship isn't the worst thing someone could offer you either. It can feel like being rejected, but if you view it maturely it is just the opposite. She isn't romantically interested in you at that time, but she is still interested in you as a companion, a confidant, a bro, etc. That person values you and to have anyone value you is an awesome thing.

It is really hard to stop liking someone. In fact, I personally think it is almost impossible. I don't think I've ever stopped liking someone, but if you try you can make it less so. There will always still be a part of me that has a crush on Lisa G.**, but the parts of me that love Harry Potter or are best friends with Nick and Patrick are much bigger, because I allow them to be. I really think the best way to get over a crush is to use the mind power you're focusing on trying to get into that person's pants on other things. Take the value that you've placed on dating her and place it onto being her friend. This isn't an immediate process or anything and feelings are hard to make go away, but which ever friend your crushing on's friendship is worth working on it.

Hank Green's Friend-zone
video explained the ways out of the Friend-zone as basically either being that person's friend or bailing, because you can't handle not being their partner. The prior way is always preferable way for both parties, I believe. Perhaps the best thing to get through it is to know that no right now doesn't necessarily mean no forever, but you have to respect the current no and move your romantic interests elsewhere. If a time comes when you get to hook up, fantastic, but if it never does you have a friendship, which is a wonderful thing.

Thanks for reading and please comment

*You know, dates, making out, sex, etc.
**I'm choosing not to link back to that post

P.S. I have been guilty of pretty much everything I criticize in this post.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Friday the 13th- mini post

I have a tradition on Friday the 13th*. It basically dates back to when I started driving and there happened to be Friday the 13ths in back to back months, so yea. I always make a mix CD on Friday the 13ths. So here's the playlist:

1. Electrical Storm- U2
2. Pacific Standard Time- No Use For A Name
3. Ontario- No Use For A Name
4. We're On Fire- Armoured Bearcub
5. Surrounded (or Spiraling)- Silversun Pickups
6. Substitution- Silversun Pickups
7. Alice and the Interiors- Manchester Orchestra
8. Linoleum- NoFX
9. Whoops, I OD'd- NoFX
10. The Dregs of Sobriety- No Use For A Name
11. Lady Liberty- Okkervil River
12. Under the Garden- No Use For A Name
13. Love to a Monster- Will Sheff
14. Dance with the Angels- Lisa Loeb
15. Jaw, Knee, Music- NoFX
16. The Trumpet Player- No Use For A Name
17. Wolves at Night- Manchester Orchestra

Not much to update. I haven't been able to get enough sleep any night this week, because I woken up between 5-6 everyday and haven't gotten back to sleep. I really have no fucking clue how I did High School. I basically didn't get enough sleep for four years straight and things were alright, but now I've not been sleeping well for a few weeks and feel like death.

Thanks for reading

*Other than avoiding getting murdered and or tortured.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

I Don't Know If This Is Sappy or Pathetic

Yesterday, I went to watch the Crew play the New York Red Bulls. I knew I had made a mistake as soon as we got into the Nordecke. The section is in the northeast corner of the stadium, which meant at kickoff the sun was shining on our faces. I hadn't thought about sunscreen until that moment and desperately wished they sold it at the concessions. I'm not willing to pay $6 for a pop or other ridiculous prices, but at that moment I would've dropped a twenty for enough sunscreen to cover my face and arms.

So, now I have sunburn on both my forearms and my cheeks and the right side of my forehead*. What makes it even worse is that the Crew lost 4-1. Worse yet, within 13 minutes the Crew were down 2-0 and I just knew I was going to look like a lobster for the next few days.

While watching my team get dominated, my mind decided that it would be a really good time to be really bummed out about being single. I don't exactly what brought that on. I'm usually very good at avoiding that particular pitfall. I don't know if it was because I was being baked. Or maybe it was because Columbus Crew apparel on a girl is about my third biggest turn on.

It's silly and I kept telling myself that, but it didn't really help. So, I was sort of wallowing in the Crew loss and my singleness and looking around at all the girls who had obviously been dragged to the game by their boyfriends** or promiscuous drunk girls kissing their boyfriends and then them holding hands as they walked out (super run-on powers activate). I felt bad not that I didn't have that in that moment, but that I never have that.

I was kind of stressing about that, which heaped on top of all the homelife shit that's going down right now made my mood a very poor one. So, I took meds****, which is something I hadn't done in more than a month. The way I would describe the effects of it would be that it just so limits your cognitive abilities that you can't worry, which allowed me to get to sleep.

I woke up this morning and was totally over it and alright with my status.

I think mostly I just wish I had a pale girlfriend who always carries sunblock in her purse and is always with me when I'm too stupid to realize that the sun still burns even if it's a little chilly outside.

Thanks for reading

*I don't ever intentionally part my hair, but apparently I had shoved it to the left at some point.
**Worse than that is the girlfriends who are dragged to midnight video game releases. This is going to sound hypocritical within this post, but some people are pathologically afraid of spending anytime alone, but seriously don't make your partner come stand with you in the cold and rain for Call of Duty, if they aren't interested***.
***Tangent Achievement Unlocked.
****Xanax to be more specific