Sunday, April 8, 2012

I Don't Know If This Is Sappy or Pathetic

Yesterday, I went to watch the Crew play the New York Red Bulls. I knew I had made a mistake as soon as we got into the Nordecke. The section is in the northeast corner of the stadium, which meant at kickoff the sun was shining on our faces. I hadn't thought about sunscreen until that moment and desperately wished they sold it at the concessions. I'm not willing to pay $6 for a pop or other ridiculous prices, but at that moment I would've dropped a twenty for enough sunscreen to cover my face and arms.

So, now I have sunburn on both my forearms and my cheeks and the right side of my forehead*. What makes it even worse is that the Crew lost 4-1. Worse yet, within 13 minutes the Crew were down 2-0 and I just knew I was going to look like a lobster for the next few days.

While watching my team get dominated, my mind decided that it would be a really good time to be really bummed out about being single. I don't exactly what brought that on. I'm usually very good at avoiding that particular pitfall. I don't know if it was because I was being baked. Or maybe it was because Columbus Crew apparel on a girl is about my third biggest turn on.

It's silly and I kept telling myself that, but it didn't really help. So, I was sort of wallowing in the Crew loss and my singleness and looking around at all the girls who had obviously been dragged to the game by their boyfriends** or promiscuous drunk girls kissing their boyfriends and then them holding hands as they walked out (super run-on powers activate). I felt bad not that I didn't have that in that moment, but that I never have that.

I was kind of stressing about that, which heaped on top of all the homelife shit that's going down right now made my mood a very poor one. So, I took meds****, which is something I hadn't done in more than a month. The way I would describe the effects of it would be that it just so limits your cognitive abilities that you can't worry, which allowed me to get to sleep.

I woke up this morning and was totally over it and alright with my status.

I think mostly I just wish I had a pale girlfriend who always carries sunblock in her purse and is always with me when I'm too stupid to realize that the sun still burns even if it's a little chilly outside.

Thanks for reading

-Michael
*I don't ever intentionally part my hair, but apparently I had shoved it to the left at some point.
**Worse than that is the girlfriends who are dragged to midnight video game releases. This is going to sound hypocritical within this post, but some people are pathologically afraid of spending anytime alone, but seriously don't make your partner come stand with you in the cold and rain for Call of Duty, if they aren't interested***.
***Tangent Achievement Unlocked.
****Xanax to be more specific

3 comments:

  1. You want a bitter, drunken girlfriend? =p Naw, I know what you mean. Singleness is awesome for a lot of reasons, dude. Seriously. I know it sounds ridiculous, but it's like you get to properly figure out who you are as an human independent of another. Someday you will find an awesome hipster girl in Crew gear who carries sunscreen, I promise =]

    So now my curiosity is peaked; what are the first two biggest turn-ons? *eyebrow wiggle*

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    Replies
    1. Drunken? Yes. Bitter? No. If I have no other qualifications as a partner, I will not drag anyone to something they don't want to be at just so I don't have to be alone.

      As for the turn-ons, number two is glasses (thus my attraction to hipster girls). Number one is going to take some more prodding, Miss Emma. I confessed it once before, If you're in the mood to do some digging on Tumblr or you can just keep asking and I will give in.

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  2. Hmmmmmmm. I'll skim Tumblr over breakfast and see if I can't dig up an answer. *scurries away to tumblr*

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