Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Blog Exaggerated Distinction Awards

This is the 300th time this has happened and to commensurate this occasion, I have come to settled on what was something like, "plan D." In Celebration of reaching 300 posts and more than two years of this crap, I present to you the Pastafarian07's Blog/Too Much Mine awards.

It could be said that having an awards post for a blog that has virtually no readers is very narcissistic. Especially since I am the host and judge. And to those people I say... Pbbbbbtttttt. As I look across the vastness of the internet, I see only a few faces bothering to look and to those people I say, "thank you" and "prepared to be mocked"

The first award is for "Best Search Term," What search entries have brought people to this blog? Well, quite a lot actually, but a few (only one really) has stood out and is worthy of distinction. The nominees are:

-coughing everytime i laugh
-puppapalooza maryland
-asking for direction with dick out
-my minecraft crib

 The Winner is: asking for direction with dick out. Accepting on behalf of this search term is meeeeee.

Who would've thought that having that experience with that creepy fucktard would lead to this. I just want to remind everyone that there are ways to pay people $20.00 to watch you jerk off with out soliciting me. Thank You!

On to the next award is for "Best Traffic Source" This goes to the site that has generated the most views for the blog. Not that I care about views... I'm not a sellout or anything*. The nominees are:


And Google analytics determines the award will go to: There was no question in this category. Oddly enough, isn't Kathy's proper url anymore. It is now  . I'll be accepting this award aswell

I don't get many view from the new URL though. I can't blame her though. She's a published author and this is ish.

Since this isn't going well and I would really rather be watching Doctor Who we're going to jump to most viewed post.

Google Analytics decides it is: Slapping the Keyboard Like a Monkey 

I will not be accepting this award because there is absolutely no reason this post should have so many more views than my others.

Anyway honorable mention to these things:

Most commented upon post: Electoral College vs. the Popular Vote

Personal favorite post: The tornado ones
              least favorite post: The dream ones

Shout-out to all the the post with no views/comments.

Oh, did you guys know that one time I got a comment from Liane of 5AG fame? It was pretty much downhill from there until Emma turned up.

OHHH... I still need to mock. Emma you're short and your boyfriend is old. Sarah you're old and your pets smell. GOT 'EM

So yea that's 300 posts and the start of another edition of BEDA after taking the last off. Back to melodrama and angst tomorrow. .

Thanks for reading


*I am insecure

P.S. Perhaps you could leave a comment telling me which of my posts has been your favorite of the first 300. 
P.P.S. There is actually 301st post that'll never see the blog. And I'm telling you this to troll. 

1 comment:

  1. RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE. Also congrats on 300 posts. Couldn't tell you which one(s) is/are my favorite.